Auburn, Maine Police Have a Very Unique Valentine’s Gift for an Ex
Editor's note: This article was written by a Townsquare Media Northern New England contributor and may contain the individual's views, opinions or personal experiences.
Don't know what to get that special ex for Valentine's Day? The Auburn Police department has a great gift idea!
Sure you can get your current lover some chocolate and flowers, but what about that ex that did you wrong? The Auburn police want to know if you have an ex-Valentine with any outstanding warrants. Any chance you have information that they are driving around with stolen guns? Just call and they will take care of everything else!
This sounds like a pretty sweet deal for your illegal ex! All you have to do is call the Auburn Police Department and they take care of it all!
Their special includes...
limited-edition platinum bracelets, free transportation with a chauffeur, a one-night minimum stay in luxurious accommodations and professional glamour shots that will be posted online for all to enjoy. This is capped off with a special Valentine’s dinner. We know this special is so incredible that you may be tempted to provide additional referrals. We don't blame you, this is too sweet to pass by!
My favorite part of this Valentine's offer is that they say, 'Operators are standing by!' If this were on Netflix, I would binge this show. I think it should be called 'Operators are Standing By'.
Is there anyone who will take up the Auburn police on this offer? We all have exes, but do you have an ex with an outstanding warrant? I wonder if this will work for the police. I bet it won't, but it got ya thinking about that dirty no-good ex of yours!